Sunday, December 29, 2013

The Top Ten Nude Celebrities of 2013

I looked at the calendar today and realized that time was running short to make my contribution to the valuable body of work that is the collection of annual year end lists. If you are like me, you spend the better part of twelve months ignoring popular culture, current events, literature, film, politics, and the events of your own life, and wait eagerly for the weeks leading up to January 1 when internet content providers of all stripes take cursor to screen and map out the top ten of everything from the prior year. As the lists are published, I am able to catalog all of the movies I should have seen, the books I should have read, the photos that should have moved me, the meals that would have been most memorable, and the destinations I should have visited over the prior year, thus saving me from the work of experiencing any of it on my own. It is a real time saver, and I think we all owe a collective debt of gratitude to the tireless critics and social gadflies who do the heavy lifting for us.

But no longer wanting to take without giving, I have decided I too should help the people of the world and make my own top ten list to guide others.  And, no, the list won't include any nude celebrities.  What do I know from naked famous people?  That was just a teaser to get you to read.  So, without further ado, I present the Cobras In Alaska 2013 Top Ten list, with items presented in no particular order:

1. Puppies.
2. Em7add11.
3. Sipping Pina Coladas, served on the rocks out of citrus rimmed glassware and mixed from fresh pineapple juice and coconut infused rum, watching the sun set, bare feet dangling in the warm salt waters of the South Pacific, while mermaids nibble deliciously at the bacteria under my toe nails, their hair tickling my shins.
4. Cleveland, Ohio.
5. The International House of Hot Dogs.
6. Brownout – Oozy.
7. Akron, Ohio.
8. This guy:

9. Determining the proper influence of science on policy.
10. Learning a valuable lesson about the importance of friendship AND the true meaning of Arbor Day while solving mysteries on a tandem bicycle.

I hope the list proves helpful to each of you as you either map out the details of the coming year or prepare to let chance yet again dictate your fate. Happy New Year.


  1. And if you watch one movie this year, make it 'The People'. Only Shatner can create a movie that speaks as powerfully to our time as it did 4 decades ago.

    1. I had to look that one up. I some how missed it during its first run on TV in 1972. But I am intrigued. I still maintain the single most important film ever made is Mega-Shark Versus Giant Octopus. There is a movie that really speaks to us as a people.